,
Lauren and Whitney journey to Italia (but not on an autobus plane)...
W: What are you looking at?
L: The hand that just came through the seat.
W: Ham?! Is it prosciutto?
W: I can’t look at you without laughing.
L: Now that’s what every girl wants to hear.
Random guy: Would you like to join our English tour?
L: Is there a bathroom?
Random guy: Yes, just inside.
L: OK, we'll pay to join the tour.
W: Where do you wanna eat?
L: I don’t care, but not the gay pride place, that could be awkward.
W: We have a new person.
L: Is it a guy or a girl?
W: Well, there’s a sarong in the bathroom.
L: I hope it’s a girl. I hope she’s not a fan nazi.
W: She broke the light!
L: That guy scared me last night.
W: He was so loud! It sounded like he had leather and chains!
L: That was the cleanest bathroom in the city!
W: Best. Bathroom. Ever. I stole some toilet paper.
L: From the Vatican?!
W: I'm not using the baby oil!
Guy 1: You take an autobus plane?
L&W: Autobus plane? (Lauren waves her arms as if flying) Wtf?!
L: How do you say “glass ?”
Guy 1: Like “glass of wine?” You say “Prendo un bicchiere di vino blanco.”
L to W: Ahh, that’s how you ended up with an entire bottle of wine.
Guy 2: You just friends?
W: Yeah, not gay.
Guy 1: What is she doing?
L: Whitney, why are you doing the running man? We’re supposed to be getting in car!
L: We’re stopped in the middle of the street because of Facebook!
W: Can you put my shorts in your purse?
W: You just bit my tip!
L: That’s what he said.
L: What is that?
Guy 2: Grappa.
L: (makes a face) Tastes like death!
L: You parked on the curb… in the middle... of the street.
Guy 2: It’s OK! Don’t worry.
W: You just stepped in pee.
L: Crap! Are you sure?
W: I think so. Are you putting hand sanitizer on your shoe?!
Guys 1 and 2 to L&W: You pay now!
Guy 1: Mozarella!
W: What? Americans like food?
Guy 1: You eat McDonalds?
L to Guy 2: Why are they talking about cheese and McDonalds?
W: We need a code word.
L: Like what?
W: Umm, Longhorn.
L: What?
W: Well you are wearing that color.
L: What is he doing?
W: He just moved the moped.
L: So that’s how he parked in that spot.
W: Polka dots!
Guy 1: My futbol!
W: It says “together forever”
Guy 2: My angel and devil!
W: Do you even know what that means?!
L to Guy 2: Are those Coach shoes?!
L: He had a bidet!
W: I know! I wanted to try it out!
L: I thought the guy in our room was going to be a girl. Whose sarong is that?!
W: His? Did he put it on and leave?
L: I don’t wanna fight fan nazi! FML.
W: Where do you wanna eat?
L: I don’t care, but not the gay pride place, that could be awkward.
W: We have a new person.
L: Is it a guy or a girl?
W: Well, there’s a sarong in the bathroom.
L: I hope it’s a girl. I hope she’s not a fan nazi.
W: She broke the light!
L: That guy scared me last night.
W: He was so loud! It sounded like he had leather and chains!
L: That was the cleanest bathroom in the city!
W: Best. Bathroom. Ever. I stole some toilet paper.
L: From the Vatican?!
W: I'm not using the baby oil!
Guy 1: You take an autobus plane?
L&W: Autobus plane? (Lauren waves her arms as if flying) Wtf?!
L: How do you say “glass ?”
Guy 1: Like “glass of wine?” You say “Prendo un bicchiere di vino blanco.”
L to W: Ahh, that’s how you ended up with an entire bottle of wine.
Guy 2: You just friends?
W: Yeah, not gay.
Guy 1: What is she doing?
L: Whitney, why are you doing the running man? We’re supposed to be getting in car!
L: We’re stopped in the middle of the street because of Facebook!
W: Can you put my shorts in your purse?
W: You just bit my tip!
L: That’s what he said.
L: What is that?
Guy 2: Grappa.
L: (makes a face) Tastes like death!
L: You parked on the curb… in the middle... of the street.
Guy 2: It’s OK! Don’t worry.
W: You just stepped in pee.
L: Crap! Are you sure?
W: I think so. Are you putting hand sanitizer on your shoe?!
Guys 1 and 2 to L&W: You pay now!
Guy 1: Mozarella!
W: What? Americans like food?
Guy 1: You eat McDonalds?
L to Guy 2: Why are they talking about cheese and McDonalds?
W: We need a code word.
L: Like what?
W: Umm, Longhorn.
L: What?
W: Well you are wearing that color.
L: What is he doing?
W: He just moved the moped.
L: So that’s how he parked in that spot.
W: Polka dots!
Guy 1: My futbol!
W: It says “together forever”
Guy 2: My angel and devil!
W: Do you even know what that means?!
L to Guy 2: Are those Coach shoes?!
L: He had a bidet!
W: I know! I wanted to try it out!
L: I thought the guy in our room was going to be a girl. Whose sarong is that?!
W: His? Did he put it on and leave?
L: I don’t wanna fight fan nazi! FML.
Guy 1: You have your visa?
W: What? Visa? We're only here for five days.
Guy 1: You have your visa in NY?
W: we live in NY!
Guy 1: But you are from Texas.
L: Texas isn't a country!
L: I don’t like turtle necks, I prefer V-necks.
Hostel guy: You are too sexy for the Vatican. Maybe go when more sober.
W: I was going to let fan nazi shower, but after he walked in on me peeing, I said “Fuck that” and went ahead and showered.
L: (looking at sculptures in the museum) Ugh, penis is the last thing I wanna see right now.
L: I just almost dropped the soap in the bidet!
W: What did you do to the toilet seat?
L: I moved it so I could shower.
W: I think my fiancé might have worked at the ice cream shop.
W: I want to find one with a tip!
L: I don’t like turtle necks, I prefer V-necks.
Hostel guy: You are too sexy for the Vatican. Maybe go when more sober.
W: I was going to let fan nazi shower, but after he walked in on me peeing, I said “Fuck that” and went ahead and showered.
L: (looking at sculptures in the museum) Ugh, penis is the last thing I wanna see right now.
L: I just almost dropped the soap in the bidet!
W: What did you do to the toilet seat?
L: I moved it so I could shower.
W: I think my fiancé might have worked at the ice cream shop.
W: I want to find one with a tip!
L: Me too!
Guy 2: I barman.
L to W: I thought he just told me he’s Batman.
Guy 2: You matches Texas tomorrow?
Other hostel guy: Go to bed! Go to bed!
Guy 2: I barman.
L to W: I thought he just told me he’s Batman.
Guy 2: You matches Texas tomorrow?
Other hostel guy: Go to bed! Go to bed!
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